Less is more.”I sat both kids down on a Sunday afternoon, showed them a few more photos of Hazel, and told them she was Daddy’s girlfriend. ” (My 4-year-old son, working on his geography.) “Can Hazel do my hair when she visits? And think it through before you do.”I didn’t go back to check in with Stephanie. A day or 2 later, Heloise tells me she’s only sad because Hazel and I would have had beautiful babies. I hear her out, hug her, and we laugh about how little brothers, for all their annoyances, are pretty special too.
The questions came fast and furious: “Are you getting married? ” (My daughter, angling.)I was non-committal about the future. I took 2 days, then sat Heloise down, and calmly told her that Hazel and I had decided to break up. ” In a close-knit community like ours, word gets around, and last year some kids told my daughter that her mom and I had divorced because of my cheating. Just before New Year’s, I’m with the kids when Hazel calls.
My daughter can remember my last 2 extended psychiatric hospitalizations; therapy has helped her enormously to cope with the stress of a divorce, a mentally ill parent, and so forth.“The key thing is to let the kids tell you how they feel,” she said.
“But don’t feel like you need to answer all their questions.
Every time I've ever broken up with someone over the phone, text, or email, the subsequent months are filled with plans to finally meet up in person and discuss what happened.You don't want to do it, even though it's the right decision.So here's how to break up with someone you're still in love with, even when it hurts.When I got home that night, he had left love notes all over my apartment, telling me he would miss me and how much he cared about me.
He also stuck a note on the fridge saying, "Remember when you cooked that horrible dinner," and one on the toilet that said, "Remember how embarrassed you were when you clogged this on our third date," which made me smile... It's easy to break up with someone you hate or to move on from a relationship that's broken.
It's hard to know how to break up with someone when you still love and care about them very much.