If I had a Higher Power, it was helping other people and getting out of my head and out of this “me” mentality—the selfishness that you have when you’re a using alcoholic.
I think it’s no coincidence I met my wife while I was volunteering, had no time for myself, and dating was the last thing on my mind.” Patti, a 27-year-old from New York with four years of sobriety in NA, says that after getting sober, she found it hard not to be drawn to the same kind of train wreck relationships of her using years.
Date like it's 1955, whether it's with someone new, or with your current partner or spouse.
Go to the movies, take a walk in the park, go skiing together, but slow down and give the intimacy a chance to develop.
“'Two sickies don’t make a welly,’ my 80-year-old sponsor used to say.” According to James, a 33-year-old photographer from Los Angeles who’s been sober for eight years, when he first came to AA he listened to what his sponsor told him and religiously avoided dating women in the program.
He didn’t date anyone at all for the first six months—he was in a Salvation Army men’s rehab anyway, so it wasn't like he had much of a choice.
I got through it with help from here, but it was the first time in a long time I felt like drinking for some reason.Looking back, I was sort of following that rule, but I should have done it much sooner.I think it depends on the person and how you are doing in your recovery.Rosalyn Dischiavo, a sexologist and licensed addiction counselor, has a cheerier outlook: “There is another, more optimistic truth about love in early sobriety: it shows that you are healing. Date like it's 1955, whether it's with someone new, or with your current partner or spouse. Belisa Vranich—a clinical psychologist specializing in sex and relationships—all agree that there is no reason why addicts and alcoholics shouldn’t be dating other addicts and alcoholics.
Go to the movies, take a walk in the park, go skiing together, but slow down and give the intimacy a chance to develop. According to Milrod, the most important foundation is simply that “sobriety needs to be a priority.
If you're feeling good and confident in yourself and you think you're ready then go for it.