Even if your husband has carried on numerous affairs during your marriage, he will not think that you are justified in seeing someone new at this time.All he will focus on is that he has been wronged and will want to seek justice anyway he can."Online dating is not only mainstream, it's one of the best ways to widen your search, rather than just hoping that you'll meet someone in the coffee shop," says Dr. And these days, there's a site for everyone, from e Harmony and Match to niche sites like JDate.Check out our Guide to Online Dating to learn the basics including setting up a profile to taking a relationship offline. Kirschner says it's easy to build up a fantasy of what he is like based on his profile and the emails you exchange.He may try to even the score by fighting about custody of the children or how to split the marital estate.If you have children, then you also need to realize that it's in your best interest to try to keep a cordial relationship with your husband.Contemplating the dating scene, many divorced women feel not just garden-variety nerves, but "actual terror," says Dr. Just remember that your fears are normal — after all, you're dealing with or have dealt with a major betrayal and upheaval — and that you don't have to jump all the way in. Tell a few trusted friends that you're interested in meeting people. "Sit down and craft a statement of what, exactly, you're after. If you feel the same way, she offers this advice: "I suggest you try to reframe it as an adventure, or as an education," she says.
"Just say, 'I'm enjoying dating you, but I want you to know that for now I'm also seeing others casually.'" Hopefully it's obvious to you that if you have children at home, you shouldn't bring dates around unless it's somewhat serious.
But it's also tough, she adds, because once you're on the dating scene you can feel like a teenager again, in that shaky, unconfident, not-sure-if-he'll-call sort of way.